On line daters are hopeful and optimistic people. They are all hoping that the next match, the next click, will be the one that brings them to the person of their dreams, to the one who will be so right for them that they will forget that they ever needed to look. They have a right to be hopeful. Whether or not you believe the theory that there is a perfect match out there for everyone, somewhere, the simple fact is that on line dating is a numbers game. It is a way to meet and learn something about a lot of people, all of whom are also looking for someone, maybe someone like you.
Depending on the site or sites that you belong to and how serious you are about looking, you could be looking at hundreds, even thousands of profiles in a short period of time. Most of these profiles you will pass by because there simply is not time to look at them all. Some you will look at and wonder how the dating site’s algorithm ever managed to match you up. However, amongst all the questionable posts and profiles, you are going to run into a few, probably several, which if they don’t actually take your breath away will at least cause you to pause for a closer look. In some cases, the closer look may lead to a conversation, and conversations can lead to dates.
If this really is the right one, dating will lead to a lifetime of happiness together, but very often the dating experience is less than you hoped for. This is OK if you both come to the realisation at about the same time. Hopefully the dates will have been a fun experience for you both, and if you cannot part as friends, at least you can both go your separate ways uninjured.
When It Isn’t Right
When things become ugly is when only one of you realises that the best thing for you both is to end the relationship. One may realise this before the other one does. The relationship will only work if both of you are willing to work at it. If you do not believe in the future of the relationship, then end it as quickly and gently as practical. This will help prevent anyone from getting too hurt, although some pain may be inevitable.
Avoiding pain for either party is generally a good thing, unless there is a measure of vengeance involved in your inspiration for breaking up. We do not condone vengeance, but it happens. Sometimes is it justified. We have all heard the urban legend about the $10 sports car. The story goes that the boy friend was going away on a business trip and asked his girl friend to find a buyer for the BMW he was selling. When the girl friend tried to call him on the road, she heard another woman’s voice in the hotel room, so she sold the car for $10.
Break up stories seem to go viral on the Internet every few weeks, the latest was Kelsi’s story.